It's been almost 6 years of wedded bliss to you, my one true love. We've been through a lot together, you and I. The ups and downs, the good and bad. As the years go by I love you more and more. You are my baby's daddy. The Han Solo to my Princess Leia. The mashed brownie to my Cold Stone sweet cream. The fire to my bbq. The white trash to my Nascar. The icing on my cupcake ("That's what she said"). And as Valentine's Day approaches, I just want you to know that no one will ever take your place in my heart.
Except Edward Cullen of course.
I asked you to read the Twilight books, and you said, "No."I pleaded with you to take me to see the movie, and you cleverly avoided it.
I begged you to talk to me the way that Edward talks to Bella, and you laughed in my face.
***
Well who is laughing now?!
This year I'm spending Valentine's Day with someone special. He's eternally handsome. Always cold. Never talks back. And fits in my pocket. He's my Edward doll, and the new man in my life.
Some might say I'm very bitter, but it just isn't true. You see, if I was angry about the whole situation, I would simply strap you to a chair with duct tape, prop open your eyes with toothpicks, and make you watch the DVD (available March 21st) over and over and over and over. But that's not my style. I'm more subtle than that. I just promise from now on to take Edward with me wherever I go. Grocery shopping, to work, church, the movies, on dates, and of course I will carefully tuck him into bed each night next to me. *sigh* Just think of wee Edward as a friendly reminder of our love and respect for one another.
Don't forget honey, that I love you forever and always (and that my memory lasts just as long).
Sincerely your devoted wife-
Megan
*This post was inspired by Busy Bee Lauren.
8 comments:
Megan-You are HILAROUS!
Love you! Happy Valentines Day to you and your cold love!
Meg, you make me laugh so hard! And Mike, my condolances at having been replaced with 6 inches of plastic ("that's what she said!).
Marie! You saucy little minx! I love it!
Megan...this is so H I L A R O U S!
Did your hubby man, babys daddy read this?
Had me laughing so hard...
XOXOX
PS. the booklist was a success...i think-wink!
Dang!! You just threw down the gauntlet with your husband. I just keep picturing you in a music video, running through a sunflower field toward mini-Edward, having dinner at a quiet restaurant with mini-Edward, with your husband spying through the window crying, a picnic on a blanket with mini-Edward and he gives you a flower. I know, I have a sick and twisted mind, but you made me go there! Ha ha! -Suzanne
Tell me what kind of flowers & chocolates and love Edward gives you. As my mom always said, a bird in the hard is worth two in the bush.
Love, MIL
PS You are so cute & funny.
Ha-ha!!
I love you Meg.
I am grateful you gave the "hint-hint" to Chad for V-day. Across the state men will be hanging their head in shame as they purchase these beloved Pocket Edwards! Ha-ha!
Does he come complete with his Silver Volvo S60 R? Too funny!!!
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